What is real? - God Is More Than Able

Have you ever been duped? 

Have you ever asked yourself, "What is real?" 

There is not a more worse feeling in the world than to find out that what you thought was real, never was real at all. It steals your joy.

In the past two years I have been terribly deceived, twice, by Satan.

Satan is so real and has his grip on this world. It is evident in the choices people make. Satan is "the thief that only comes to steal, kill, and destroy," - John 10:10. 

Dupe #1: Satan killed and destroyed my marriage more than two years ago. I say more than two years ago because there were problems for years in the marriage. There were good times, but the years of manipulation, gaslighting - not knowing what was real - feeling unworthy, and unloved, finally made me shut down and pretty much give up. Our marriage finally came to an end with my husband's adulterous affair with another woman. December 30, 2021, he left our counseling session and did not return to our marriage. I felt like Satan had stolen part of God's plan for my life and it was my fault.

Dupe#2:This past summer, I met someone online who I thought was real, true, and honest. Throughout the fall, the relationship grew through texting and sharing pictures, but never talking live or face-timing. Turns out, I was being catfished; it was a romance scam. From the years of feeling unworthy and unloved, I was foolish wanting to feel loved and special, believing the flattering words and terms of endearment from this person behind the text. The person I believed this man to be, from the pictures he shared with me, was someone else and married.  The person behind the words, not in the pictures, was a thief, an impostor. My heart was crushed when I finally wised up and realized the truth. This person was not real. Satan had stolen another piece of trust from me while in disguise.

I share my stories briefly because I know that Jesus, the one who "came so that we may have life, and have it abundantly," - John 10:10, is with me and brings me peace and joy in all of this. I know that God will use my misfortune and turn it into fortune to help someone else. 

As the lyrics say in the following song by Elevation Worship, 

"God is more than able."

"He's not done with me yet,"

"There's so much more to this story."

What I know is.... God is real! I know he is going to use me for His purpose. He says to me, "Don't let the enemy have a foothold. Get up and battle on. Stay in the fight. Someone needs you to be the light of Jesus for them when Satan brings the darkness in their life and they don't know what is real."

My friend, if you aren't sure what is real, know this, God is REAL. His love for you is REAL. He demonstrated this through the death and resurrection of His son, Jesus Christ, for our sins. God's love is REAL! Jesus is REAL! God is more than able. You will find real joy through Jesus.

Explosion of the Tongue

    

     Some days life seems to be going pretty well and there is joy abounding all around. However, underneath there is a monotonous ticking that starts off as a faint annoying click in the background, barely recognizable; I know it's there though; I feel it there, just waiting for the right moment to implode. There's a chance that all sense of emotional control may be lost at some point throughout the day. Ignoring the ticking, I go about my day with grandiose feelings of hope and encouragement.

    Everything is going good, the day is progressing with joy and happiness springing up from all around until in a split instance, something triggers a memory. I hear the ticking from earlier grow louder; I physically start to tense up and become irritated. Yet, it's not enough to set off an explosion. However, it's just enough to make me agitated and start to feel unstable. Negative thoughts start to creep into my mind. Delight and radiance which was accentuating the day is now transitory.

    As I advance deeper into the day, more negativity from the world around me begins to weigh heavy on my soul; negative words from people, complaining, unfulfilled promises, trust broken, etc. and the ticking becomes louder than before. How much more negativity until there is an explosion of pent up frustration? I feel extremely rattled now and I have lost sight of joy and in a split second...... 

BOOM!!!
Rage is released! Fear, anger, bitterness, and hurt is unleashed through hateful words that I wish I had never said. There is no going back; what has been said, has been said.

     "Among all parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself. People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, and fish, but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil full of deadly poison. Sometimes it praises our Lord and Father, and sometimes it curses those who have been made in the image of God. And so blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers and sisters, this is not right!" - James 3:6-10

    Spot on! It is NOT right! This is why I feel so guilty and shameful after a verbal explosion. Now all I can do is pray for forgiveness from my Heavenly Father and ask for forgiveness from those whom I have attacked or wounded with my words. I cannot take back what I have said. However, showing true Godly sorrow for my words is the first step of repentance in my heart.

   "For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There's no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death." - 2 Corinthians 7:10

    All of those times I have unleashed hurtful and harmful words on others, I have always deeply felt regret and desolate. However, I know God is working on me. He is correcting the wrong that I have said and done in the past. He is relentlessly moving in my heart, making me a better person in all I say and do. 

    "His ways are greater than my ways. His thoughts are greater than mine." - Isaiah 55:9 

    The explosion is over, and it was not as bad as it could have been. This time, instead of lashing out with my words, I held my tongue and cried for a few moments. This time I prayed for peace and calmness to settle my troubled heart.

I hear Jesus' beautiful voice say to me, 
"Do not let your be heart troubled. Trust God, and trust also in me."     - John 14:1  
Calmness and peace now come over me, the ticking has stopped, and joy returns to my day. 

    

Hold On, Joy is Coming - 3

     Sometimes I feel like I am at the edge of a high cliff overlooking the ocean below. I hear the waves crashing against the rocks below and the sound gets louder as I get closer to the edge of the cliff. 

    My mind swirls with thoughts as I get closer to the edge. 

    "I can't do this anymore." 

        - One step closer to the edge; the crashing waves are louder.

    "I don't know what to do." 

        - One step closer to the edge; the crashing waves are louder.

    "I'm a fool; I'm a joke; I'm a terrible person." 

        - One step closer to the edge; the crashing waves are louder.

    "I have tried over and over again, but I continue to fail. What's the point?" 

        - One step closer, almost to the edge now; the crashing waves are deafening.

    "God, where are you?" I cry out. "Jesus, I need you! Holy Spirit move in me!" 

        - Then, one more step and a kind voice drowns out the deafening sound of the crashing waves, 

    "I'm here. Trust me. Hold on. You are going to make it. Step away from the edge."

    I want to trust. I want to believe, yet there is a quiet, nagging voice in the distance saying, "Take another step. Everything will be better if you just step off the edge." 

        - I start to step... then, I feel a hand on my shoulder pull me back before I take that last step.

    Instantly, I feel a warm embrace and hear the kind voice from earlier say, "You are mine and I will not let you go. Trust me."

    The sound of the crashing waves have been silenced, and I find myself far away from the edge of the cliff. However, I know I will be back. 

        - Next time will I be as close to the edge?
        - Next time will the crashing waves be louder?
        - Next time will the nagging voice in the distance win? 

    In my questioning, the kind voice that pulled me back from the edge and warmly embraced me declares, "I will never leave you or forsake you. Call on me. I am always with you until the end of the age. I created you and I love you. My grace is sufficient. My strength is with you. I have good things planned for you. I will not let go. So don't you let go. Hold on." 

    I know this is my Savior, Jesus Christ, and I know he has so much more for me and for my life. 

    Some distance away from the edge of the cliff now, the swirling thoughts of doubt and unworthiness have disappeared. Beautiful thoughts of possibilities begin to play in my mind and I have joyful hope for the future. 

    As I joyfully hope for the future, I am reminded of the following Bible verse from the Apostle Paul, "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer." - Romans 12:12 

    Dear friends, I pray that when you are close to the edge, you hear the voice of Jesus calling and trust him to pull you back. He loves you so much, that he gave up his life and died for you. Trust in Jesus. Hold On. Joy is coming.

Peace Allows Joy to Take Root - 2

At times I feel like I'm at peace, and the roots of joy in my life grow deeper. At other times, I feel like a storm is raging inside and there is no peace and joy is uprooted. I then ask the question, is there such thing as peace? Look at all that madness and turmoil in this world. But then, in the calamity of the storm, I hear an answer. Yes, there is peace. 

Jesus told his disciples, "I am leaving you with a gift - peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid." - John 14:27 NLT

So why is it a struggle to find peace at times? 

For me, I think I lose sight of God's gift of peace when I rely on myself, other people, and the world without focusing on Christ and giving Him praise and glory for what is happening around me. When I don't trust God peace becomes fleeting allowing chaos and fear to grow up like weeds in my life. That is exactly what Satan wants. The Apostle Peter warns us in 1 Peter 5:8 NLT, "Stay alert! Watch out for the great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour." Satan wants a world without peace and a world without joy. 

However, I find reassurance in John 14:33 NLT when Jesus says, "I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." What joy it is to know that my peace is found in Jesus! Satan cannot have my peace, because Jesus has already overcome the world. Jesus dwells in my heart. So when the struggle and storm for peace rages, all I have to do is take heart because my Savior is with me. The gift of peace that Jesus has given each of us, allows joy to take root in our lives and causes chaos and fear to whither away.

What's your gift that brings you.....Joy! - 1

 

28 years of teaching have come to a close. 

This was a great year! 

Each year I find more joy through my teaching experiences!

Each of us is called by God to do something with our time on earth. We each have a special gift or talent from God.

 "In His grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well." - Romans 12:6. 

What is your gift from God? Have you ever taken time to think and pray about it?  

Take a moment to reflect on your life and your current occupation. 

Is it God's gift to you? 

If so, are you capitalizing on it? 

If not, how can you find or amplify your gift?

Romans 12:6-8  continues, "So if God has given you the ability  to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging, If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. and if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly." 

Teaching and working with kids is my true calling from God. He has always lead me to positions and opportunities to coach and educate kids. 

Over the years I have learned that I need a break from teaching in order to do it well. 

Yes, school's out for summer. Yes, I look forward to summer break. However, that doesn't mean it's time to quit and do absolutely nothing until the week before the next school year begins.

 As crazy as it may seem, I have already started planning for the next school year. 

God gives us breaks to reflect, refresh, and renew our strength so that we can bring honor to His name.

"He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name." - Psalms 23:3

Summer is a time to reflect on what went right and what hasn't gone right. 

It's a time to evaluate what needs to be refreshed and what needs to be trashed. 

It's a time to search and renew what has been lost.

I pray that you find God's gift in your life, and that you make time to reflect, refresh, and renew in order to honor His joyous calling for your life.